i’m stuck

I don’t have beautiful assumptions ordelicate fingers grazing the sweet grasses of balladry, no udder to secrete,though I am bloated and obscene in this unnaturally large state of sadness, a great pungent paean quivers with embers of violence,  and,to keep quiet, I cry without embarrassment, a hot broth of celery, carrots and love exculpatesmy fermented hate— I am loved, and I adore bleeding onto…… Continue reading i’m stuck

flux of human life

I never learned anything well—             I’ve been moving through as best as I can fake it. As long as my point can get across, I have no expectations about sounding like a scholar— I am not important, my miniscule web isn’t intricate, but it catches what it needs. As a child I had this dream…… Continue reading flux of human life


Blood. I’m bleeding, and I can feel the decay—I wonder if I felt my being made? We must carry some sort of remembrance of growing a heart, a clitoris—our eyes? We must.  I feel the metaphorical leaves falling from my branches. I am reaching a new season—a new set of characters on this sitcom wait…… Continue reading juggler

Among Ghosts

Sometimes supernatural stories are hard to write because they happen like dreams do. They move in slow-motion; time jumps and twitches. The first time something otherworldly happened to me was when I was living in El Monte, CA in 1988.  My mom, dad and I had moved into my Navajo grandfauxther’s house on Emery St.,…… Continue reading Among Ghosts

binds and blinds

I am torn. There is a glacier making its way down a current, heading straight to an island of wildlife, and, I am sitting here bleeding nonstop, thinking of a cardigan I want, that is way beyond my budget.  Why are we this way?  How did I get this way?  I can answer that. I…… Continue reading binds and blinds

macular degeneration

I want to erase the “I” in Ingrid. I want to dig the grid of my eyes, and finally see. I got these eyes checked on December 3rd, “oh wow, that’s high astigmatism, we recommend you get these specialty lenses so that they won’t look too thick.” What’s wrong with thick? What’s wrong with my…… Continue reading macular degeneration

the beginning

A Gift of Time “Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.”-Khalil Gibran- One day I will find the right words, and they will be simple. ”  -Jack Kerouac- “Entonces disfruta tu dolor. Aprovéchalo ahora que eres joven. Y sufre, hijo mío, sufre todo lo que puedas,…… Continue reading the beginning

Here is my truth

Here is my truth. I wish I had a song to sing  or a dance to dance— but I only have words. Here,  this is it. Everyone is selfish and dishonest. Making excuses. The priest,  your dad,  the man,  the woman,  you. We reject what we don’t remember,  for example  see how we make our…… Continue reading Here is my truth

Coachella 2005

It’s one of those memories that feels unreal now. It was 2005 and I was at Coachella waiting for NIN to come on. I was by a huge papier-mâché baby somewhere on the side of the stage. I was high, I think. I must’ve been high. Someone must’ve offered me something and I had smoked it. I…… Continue reading Coachella 2005

music is a rite of passage

The kitchen is hot, the oven is on and a shepherd’s pie cooks. Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan sings to me, like he has sang to me for so many years.  I found him like one finds a favorite word.  I went to the Grauman’s Chinese Theatre in 1994 and watched “Natural Born Killers” with my…… Continue reading music is a rite of passage