* I have essays on how Madonna saved me, so I won’t bore you with the nuances. But I will say that “Bad Girl,” was an anthem for me. I started smoking at 13 and was raped at 5. There are so many emotions that surfaced and most of the time I allowed myself to indulge in them. Be it sex, drugs, and all the beautiful things young angry creatures do. It’s a rite of passage, right? Anyways, this song’s video featured a semi-young Christopher Walken playing “Death,” so I was obviously smitten. It still plays in my veins sometimes, if I listen to it in the silence of my growth.
I am giving of my heart.
I invite
on a string,
[my haunt];
a harsh mouth exhumes,
is exhausted.
An acrid laugh
leaves the corners of
my bore.
A warm hand holds my hip,
I move away,
in nestled frigid incantation—
Pale in the cold winter air
is a hope, that a sad devil
will suspend
a loving trance
a loving scare.
I wait.
Notes of a Dirty Young Woman 